i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
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