Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
