living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Randomize
