Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize
