What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age