We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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