I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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