Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Randomize
