her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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