D3 body, D1 cock
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
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