I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize