So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
