White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated