Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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