is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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