Those balls look pretty dangerous.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
