I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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