I want to stick my p in your. b.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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