I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
