Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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