she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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