someone threw a dead crab at me
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I wear drunk well.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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