I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
