How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
