Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
