you guys were way drunker than both of me
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize