Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
