office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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