She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
