Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
