whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
