it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
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