Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
