I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
