She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
