I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
