I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize