I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
