I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
