FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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