At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I need to calm my uterus...
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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