we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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