I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
