the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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