a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
