I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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