ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
