Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.