Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
After tacos, we're chasing women.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize