My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize