I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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