Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
