If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
